Is Your Self-Esteem Attached to Your Salary?
What is your self-worth dependent on? Do
you measure it by the money you are earning? If so, you may be feeling that you
are worth a lot less than you were a few years ago. But, it probably isn’t you
– the world’s economy seems to be faltering and everyone (well, almost
everyone) is earning less than they had before.
I have friends who were retired and
comfortable who lost so much in this recession that they now can no longer
travel and have to budget their retirement funds very carefully. Others have
gone back to work, taking jobs that have far less status or intellectual
requirements than those they had before retirement.
If you, like so many men and women over 50
have been downsized and you have been forced to accept a position at far less
money and prestige than you are accustomed to having, it might be affecting how
you view your worth. If you lost your job completely, or have seen your savings
and investments lose value, you might be tempted to think less of yourself.
But, that’s not really what self-esteem is
all about. Your self-worth, your sense of yourself should be determined by who
you are – what kind of person you are – not how much you are earning or the
title they gave you at work.
Self-esteem has two components according to
Nathaniel Branden, (The Psychology of Self-Esteem). The first is your basic
lovability. Although the basic sense of lovability starts from the manner in
which your parents acted towards you when you were just a baby, as an adult you
can certainly enhance it by the manner in which you interact with others. Are
you a good person? Do you care about people and do they care about you? Can you
look yourself in the mirror and say that you like the person you are?
The second component of self-esteem has to
do with your ability to function effectively in the world. Look at all you’ve
accomplished up ’till now. You’ve made it. You’ve been successful. You’ve
climbed your mountains and achieved much of what you set out to achieve in
life. Mountains can be of all sizes and shapes. Whether you’ve achieved success
as a locksmith or as an athlete doesn’t matter. What matters is that you feel
good about what you’ve done.
So, now you are over 50 and feel as though
you’ve been rejected and discarded. I’m here to tell you it’s not because of
you – not because of what you have or have not done. We are living in a crazy
world where only youth and the latest fad seem to matter. Don’t let it get to
you.
Generally speaking, what do we bring to the
workplace? Maturity, wisdom, time management, the ability to get others
motivated and productive, organizing and planning the projects and programs.
Most of us have learned not to take offense where none was intended and to be
the mediators and conciliators when others are in conflict. Certainly we have
the ability to give guidance based on our many years of experience. We are
sensible and seasoned. What we offer is perspective and “adult
supervision.”
So stand tall, look yourself in the mirror,
and remind yourself that you are worth a great deal.
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